At Death's Door
by Lady of the Phoenix
Summary: Even on his deathbed he will set the story straight for their sake. Deathfic Minor hint at NidaxSelphie


Author's Notes: After sitting online, rather bored, I decided to find fics with Nida in them here on Fanfiction. Do you people know how many I found that mention him in the summary? 28 and none of them seem complete or truly part of Nida (I will say I enjoy Sidelines, a current Work in Progress by someone that is rewriting the game as if Nida was the hero). People, I love Nida. He is the one that deserves the true recognition. And here I am just doing a short drabble. I feel Nida deserves this. Thank you for reading, and please review. So, enjoy the deathbed rambling of my dear sweet Nida. And the last name I use for Nida is a tribute to the character designer for Square-Enix/Squaresoft.

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Say what you want, I've heard it all before. I know the story better than you do really. Once upon a time there was an evil sorceress, and six brave teens stepped up and risked their lives to stop her. In the end it all turned out all right and everyone lived happily ever after. If you think that is the true story, then you've got another thing coming. You see, I am the only one here that can possibly tell you the story from an objective point of view. I'm the only one that saw it all and knew what was going on in the background. And who am I you ask? Figures that you wouldn't know me… Honestly, I don't mind, I've gotten used to it. You have to when you go through nearly 120 years of life without someone giving you so much as a backward glance. But anyway, I am Nida, Nida Nomura of SeeD. I was their glorified chauffer for more years than I can count. On top of that, I'm the last one left alive of the major players.

So, you ask me, why am I telling you this now? Simple, they wouldn't have wanted worshiped. You treat them like they were Hyne incarnate. People, it's not that hard to understand. Do you realize that they wouldn't have done a damn thing if it wasn't for orders? I flew that Garden because of orders, and Squall killed Ultimecia because of orders. None of them are those glorified people you paint or the heroes you idolize. They were kids, just like I was. We were also soldiers, all but Rinoa, and we were taught to kill without remorse. Do you know how much blood is actually on our hands? I'm not talking monster blood, I'm talking human casualties here. And not just those from the Sorceress War either. Do any of you have ANY clue as to how many parents sent their children to Gardens after the war, or how many kids tried to be like us? Do you know how many died thinking they could take on what we did after many years of training? It's enough to make you cast away those damned ideals of yours and curse our names. Alas, as humans you have no choice but to set them up on pedestals and see how far they fall!

Let me tell you something, Squall was NEVER the man you thought he was. He was a killer, and he hated it. He hated fighting his rival and best friend in such a way. He hated people looking up to him, he hated being Head Master, and he hated people depending on him. You made him a President, and he didn't want to be one. He would have told you, but he couldn't. All in all, Squall was a nice guy. Sure, he was introverted, but he was kind. After the war he would come up to the rarely used bridge where I'd eat lunch. I had been made an instructor you see, teaching aviation. But, as I was saying, he'd come up and talk to me. We shared a lot, though neither of us was ever truly known to the other. All he ever wanted was a SeeD's life, and the occasional sparring session with his best friend and rival, Seifer Almasy.

Then there is Rinoa Heartily. The one thing history books won't tell you is how much the others hate her. It's kinda funny you know how Quistus and Xu would down talk her on the bridge when the three of us were alone. I mean, come on, some pampered rich kid thinking she could HELP fully trained SeeDs kill a Sorceress? That female was suffering from delusions, even until the day Squall left her. Never could figure out why he left her, but she wasn't too bright. See, it's simple; she put a spell on him, tying him to her as her knight. But the spell was no where near as strong as it could have been, and she ended up losing her control over him. Ended up married to some military guy her father knew. But history will tell you she was a great woman, a modern princess… She always did love those fairy tale endings, so let her keep that.

Though you all may like the thought, Selphie was NOT some ditz. Hell, she ended up as the Headmistress of Trabia Garden, but she should have been a doctor or something. She always remembered me, and I never got to thank her for it. If the group ever went out to party, I was always invited by her. She made me feel like I belonged. It hurts to know she had to watch the man she loved die, she never deserved pain. So much happiness died in her when that happened. He was everything to her. We all thought they'd have lots of kids, but…

Irvine Kinneas died before his 30th birthday in a car accident. I've always felt sorry and slightly guilty for it. I mean, I could have given him a lift to his date with Selphie, but he said no. I shouldn't have listened to him. He was a great guy. Sure, he seemed to be a ladies man, but he was devoted to Selphie. I saw him when he was dying… I was there; I took him to the hospital. He asked me to take care of Selphie, and I hope he isn't mad at me in the afterlife for marrying her. Still, he was all in all the best kinda guy to have around in any situation.

What can I tell you about Quistus? She was never as uptight as they told you. Quisty was everything a guy could ever want if he didn't want a sniveling coward. Your books say that she was some regal beauty, but she was so much more than that. During the war she opened up a lot to me and Xu on the bridge. She's the one that taught me to play cards. For the longest time I felt afraid of her, but once you got past the whip, she wasn't so bad. She was going to be something one day. More so than any of us could, she knew what she was going to do.

I guess that the last one of those heroes you know is Zell. People called him a waste of energy after the war, but he had something in him, something that made him so much stronger than the rest of us. Zell knew that no matter what happened, he'd make it through, he would survive. And survive he did. He died twenty years ago, his perpetual energy with him until the very end. People just viewed him as some hyper-active twerp, but Zell was a weapon. He never needed anything to fight with other than his fists, and yet he always found a reason to fight, to be the righteous hero. Hyne on high, he was a far better person than I could be. He was noble and strong, someone for us to look up to.

Have you heard of the villain's fate? Seifer was probably the one closer to being a hero than any one else needed to be, or deserved. Seifer, your great villain, the evil man, ended up being a bigger hero than the others. Damn romantic dream was kind fulfilled you see. He was a cop for the rest of his natural life, caught more murderers and protected more innocents than you can count. He was so much more than met the eyes.

Why am I writing this all down? I'm on my deathbed, my son and granddaughter at my bedside, watching these lasts moments, hoping to help me fulfill my own dream. See, what you don't get is that as heroes, and their friends, many of us were forced into bad positions. Our dreams were lost to appease you all. Seifer wanted to be someone like Squall was; a leader, not a follower. Quistus dreamt of being a doctor, and what a doctor she would have made. You forced her into a life in Garden as a damn magic instructor. Then there was Zell. All he ever wanted was to be the best and live up to the memory of his grandfather. Instead he was a martial arts instructor for most of his life. Selphie wanted to write. Did you know that? My dear sweet wife was talented. She could have written many great novels, but she was headmistress instead. Irvine could have been a musician. You really should have seen him at the Garden Festivals. He could play that piano like no other; there was so much emotion there. Rinoa was going to be a movie star… Well, I guess that she was one anyway. Squall never even had the chance to figure out what he wanted to be! So he took the life given to him, refusing to think of wanting something else. And now, even on my deathbed, you would steal my own dream from me. As much as I loved the sky, history is my passion. For over seventy years people have ignored my biographies of my friends. Sure, they will take me for interviews as the last person that was alive during the war, but they ignore me. My son and grand-daughter are going to take this foreword and my last attempt at the last true history of the war and the people in it.

I feel death's cold grip coming to me now. Please, listen to me, read my story, read of their lives, and take them off of these pedestals before their families and descendants are left to take the miserable fall.


End file.
